When Writers Block Conquers
As a performance poet heavily rooted In the east coasts scene of emerging hit or miss legends,, I sometimes feel inclined to pump out poems at the speed of my need to be recognized.. When that inclination hits, I find it abundantly necessary to retreat and create because I know if I am feeling this way, then so are many others among me.. And honestly, the way my brand is set up, I really have no need to attempt keeping up with the love joneses
In my "scene", a term that I use quite lightly, I observe far more than I react or impulsively contribute. In doing this Ive come to realize that some poorly executed, lyrical ejaculation of the ego becomes more highly regarded than the well thought out prose of the profoundly more "woke" poet. This is not to say that those who have paved the way aren't still killing it respectively. It's just that between the poetically prophetic, and the tangibly trite, we as an emerging subculture of performers have forgotten what is actually worthy of artistic celebration.
When i jot down an entry in my journal I don't expect an applause to erupt from the pages simply because I chose to share. I carry this with me in respects to the the stage. I cannot for the life of me figure out the appeal of bringing to the mic the unfiltered ramblings of my idle self in hopes to gain or regain the interest of those who back the local venues, buy CD"s and chapbooks and make it so we are not performing amongst ourselves week to week,
It may seem as though i've strayed away from the initial subject at hand but all these factors contribute to what I personally know as writers block..
It's super necessary that as an artist I record, internalize, conceptualize and interoperate the world as I know and see it. But its the acknowledgement of static within my craft that deters me from pushing my creative documentations forward.. I don't want to get lost in the muck and monotony of poets insisting upon themselves. The problem is, everyones performing and no ones meditating. on a vision, a point of view let alone an initial voice from which project from.
I know that at some point I've been blessed to have found my voice amidst a screaming demographic that comes off as mostly lost and self-sabotaging. Yet it's hard to remain interested in even your own innermost feelings when they pour from you with no regards to your ability to accept or come to terms with them. Even still, i've managed to uphold some sort of grace whilst I purge for the enjoyment of others. I can't let these factors keep me from creating and sharing in righteousness to myself. So how do I get to see the forrest through the self serving trees…? Heres how I tried.
I first began by gathering every journal, cocktail napkin, and voice memo that i've confessed into within the last 10 years. I took from them as many concise trains of thought as I could and I put them into paragraph form. I gave myself the freedom to turn these fragments into, poetry, song, short story or essay depending on how each piece spoke to me. From there, I had a few promising irons on the fire.
It doesn't hurt to pour yourself a brandy and drop a needle on the sounds of some brilliant storytellers to help you in the process. (Vinyl still has its charm))
Now you can start from scratch or draw from the jewels you've jotted down along your journey. Either way, remain patient with your process and see yourself through each and every moment you feel the need to close the book on your voice. Writing, among many things, should not be something you measure against the length of someone else's manuscript. It should merely serve as one of many creative avenues on which to get your point across. And when the stage or performance aspect is involved, remain true to yourself in regards to individual appeal. Because no one can be you like you. And no one has experienced life through your view. And it is your particular view that is ultimately priceless regardless of syntax or assumed celebrity.